Do men naturally know more about sex than women? On a recent Facebook post, still deeply bothered by that infamous clip from Josh Howerton, I asked this question, “Do we think men "naturally" know more about sex than women do? And that men are equipped to teach...
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What is the Window of Tolerance? And What Does It Mean about Sex?
The window of tolerance concept helps highlight emotional health. On a recent podcast episode, I was honoured to have licensed counsellor, Jay Stringer, on as a guest. One of the things he talked about was that evangelical views on gender roles and marriage are...
7 Ways Churches Can Help People Going through Divorce
with thanks to Brazos Press and the book Forgiveness After Trauma for sponsoring this post. Divorce is one of the most painful things a person can go through. But often, right when people need help the most, the church abandons them. A few weeks ago on the Bare...
What Does Accountability Look Like When Someone Hurt You?
Accountability is a necessary part of forgiveness and reconciliation. And yet often it’s downplayed, where even asking for accountability is somehow proof that you haven’t forgiven. Over the last few weeks we’ve been walking through some amazing truths from Susannah...
When Evangelical Misogyny Goes Viral: “Stand Where He Wants You to Stand”
So a funny thing happened to me last week regarding that Josh Howerton video... First, I should be thankful I wasn't feeling particularly well on Thursday. Episode 230 of the Bare Marriage podcast dropped, where Jay Stringer and I were talking about a terrible clip by...
PODCAST: Why Evangelical Honeymoons Go So Badly feat. Jay Stringer
Is the honeymoon all about the guy FINALLY getting sex? Nope. But too often evangelicals talk like this--and it has grave consequences. Licensed counselor Jay Stringer sent me a video a few weeks ago that he was really concerned about. SBC Megachurch pastor Josh...
What Does It Mean to Lament After Betrayal?
With thanks to Brazos Press for sponsoring this post. Forgiveness is possible only after we’ve had the opportunity to name our losses. That’s how Susannah Griffith opens the chapter on lamentations in her book Forgiveness After Trauma. We talked about the book on the...
6 Surprising Things About Biblical Forgiveness
Why does our doctrine of forgiveness and healing often cause so much pain? We’re told the problem is our hearts, that we’re just bitter. But what if it’s not that? What if our teaching on forgiveness has gotten things all wrong? This week, on the podcast, I introduced...
Does Sex Hurt the First Time?
Is sex really painful the first time? That’s one of the most common questions I get asked from engaged women waiting for the wedding night. How much is going to hurt? What should I expect? This month I’m going to look at some “myths” that we often have around sex....
3 Ways Your Spouse Should Pass the Roommate Test
We love to say that spouses aren’t just roommates And they’re definitely not! Roommates share a living space, and little else. Spouses are supposed to share everything. But at the same time, there are some basic things that go into the roommate experience that may...
What if the 5 Love Languages Are Junk Science?
Do the 5 Love Languages stand up to scientific scrutiny? In January of this year, an article was published and was called Popular Psychology Through a Scientific Lens: Evaluating Love Languages From a Relationship Science Perspective in the Psychological Science...
PODCAST: Do You Even Want This Kind of Marriage?
What if...the people we listen to for advice are more likely to be being abused? And what if the couples held up as ones to emulate by organizations like Focus on the Family are actually in really destructive relationships? This was a sad one for me to record, because...
Are Women Actually More Emotionally Intelligent than Men?
God Didn’t Make Women To Be Better at Relationships than Men. We talked in our first podcast of the month about four new studies on marriage & sex. This month we’re taking a deeper dive into the studies in some of our blog posts. So let’s look at this study:...