Welcome to our new website!
It looks like you’re trying to find some content that isn’t available anymore. I (Sheila) have been blogging at To Love, Honor and Vacuum since 2008–that’s a lot of blog posts over the years!
As we moved to Bare Marriage, we were picky about what content we brought over. The post you are looking for didn’t make the cut. However, there are still over 900 posts on this website so I am sure you can find something for your situation here!
Here’s where you can search for specific topics, or else see the latest on the blog:
Recent Posts
What if the 5 Love Languages Are Junk Science?
Do the 5 Love Languages stand up to scientific scrutiny? In January of this year, an article was published and was called Popular Psychology Through a Scientific Lens: Evaluating Love Languages From a Relationship Science Perspective in the Psychological Science...
The Question That Haunts Me 35 Years Later
Scott was a seriously cute Australian whose accent made me swoon. I was 18-years-old, and attending Capernwray Bible college in England for a semester before I started at Queen’s University the following year. And I spent the first few weeks trying to get Scott’s...
PODCAST: Do You Even Want This Kind of Marriage?
What if...the people we listen to for advice are more likely to be being abused? And what if the couples held up as ones to emulate by organizations like Focus on the Family are actually in really destructive relationships? This was a sad one for me to record, because...
When Male Hierarchy Teaching Turns Good Men Bad
Not everyone who ends up dominating their wife is actually an abuser at heart. What they are doing may be abusive; the same dynamics may be at play, and the same harm may be being done. But it doesn’t always come from the same place. Over and over again since we have...
Are Women Actually More Emotionally Intelligent than Men?
God Didn’t Make Women To Be Better at Relationships than Men. We talked in our first podcast of the month about four new studies on marriage & sex. This month we’re taking a deeper dive into the studies in some of our blog posts. So let’s look at this study:...
A Fun Conversation Starter with Your spouse: A Short Version of Our Survey
Want something to help you have some deep conversations with your spouse? Keith and I are in the throes of finishing up the first big draft of our marriage book that comes out next spring! It's due in at the publishers on March 1. A big part of that book is the...
PODCAST: Lies Women Believe Part 2–Is God a Monster?
We're back with Lies Women Believe, Part 2! Last week Natalie Hoffman and Gretchen Baskerville joined us to look at the problems in Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth's book Lies Women Believe, specifically about marriage. But to be honest, there was so much more about this book...
Valentine’s Day: What If Marriage Isn’t Supposed To Be That Hard?
What if marriage isn't supposed to be that hard? This is one of those weird years where Valentine's Day and Ash Wednesday land on the same day. For non-liturgical folks who don't follow the church calendar, Ash Wednesday is the day that Christians confess their sins...
NEW RESEARCH: Women Aren’t Turned On by Husbands Who Act Like Dependents
What happens to women’s desire level if their husbands don’t do housework? This month, our series on the blog is going to focus on some new studies that have recently been published in peer reviewed journals. We like keeping up with research, and we shared four new...









