Recent Posts
PODCAST: The Porn Triage–How to Tell How Likely Recovery Will Be
Can we have a nuanced discussion about porn and the likelihood of recovery? One of our goals for what we do is to help people have "informed consent"--in other words, before they make a decision, they need to know all the facts. We can't be afraid of data and...
The Southern Baptist Convention’s Sexual Abuse Report
Callous and smug. That's the impression I got about those high up in the Southern Baptist Convention after reading the report that dropped on the weekend about the sexual abuse scandal in the denomination, and how it has been ignored, covered up, and minimized, while...
On Spanking: When You Think You’re Following the Bible, but You’re Really Following Your Own Interpretation
It's easy to use the "we're just following the Bible!" trumpcard when debating something, and spanking proves an excellent example of how this can go awry. We've been talking about spanking as a method of discipline for a few weeks now, and two weeks ago we did a...
Spanking Fixed It For You: It’s Okay to Change Your Mind about Spanking
I never spanked my kids. Well, there's a funny story about Katie, but I'll leave that for another time. What I did do, though, was write a column in my weekly paper about twenty years ago bemoaning the fact that the Children's Aid Society was taking children away...
PODCAST: How We Love–Attachment Styles and Marriage with the Yerkovichs!
How do our attachment styles--or love styles--affect our marriage? This month on the blog we're talking all about attachment styles. So often we think that our marriage problems are about communication, or habits, or normal conflicts. But what if they're rooted in how...
What the Hookup Culture and Purity Culture Have in Common
What if both purity culture and the hookup culture are teaching people to treat sex with dissociation and disconnection?Sheila here! Today I'm proud to turn the blog over to Sam Jolman, a licensed counselor in Colorado who is passionate about promoting a healthy idea...
On Michelle Duggar’s Signature and the Infantilization of Women in Fundamentalist Christianity
Like you, I'm heartbroken by the Josh Duggar case, and by the continued support for him from his wife. I noticed something that I shared on social media yesterday, and I thought it was worth a super quick post because I'm curious what my commenters think (and there...
A 7 Point Plan for the Church to Care for Victims, not Support Abusers
What happens when we stress forgiveness over authenticity and confession? I want to start this morning with the story that got me thinking in this direction, and then propose 7 guidelines for how we, as Christians, handle taking sides when abuse is made public....
On Modesty: We Shouldn’t Sacrifice Teen Girls’ Well-Being for Adult Men’s Comfort
A basic principle in the Old Testament is actually quite a simple one: People of God don't sacrifice children. Read through the prophets, and you'll hear the judgment against nations that sacrifice their kids to Molech, or make children "walk through the fire."...
The 5 Love Styles and the Attachment Styles Dance
Our attachment style that we learn in childhood affects our "love styles" as adults. I'm a big fan of the book How We Love by Milan and Kay Yerkovich. It's one of the few Christian marriage books that I can recommend wholeheartedly. How We Love is based on...