Welcome to our new website!
It looks like you’re trying to find some content that isn’t available anymore. I (Sheila) have been blogging at To Love, Honor and Vacuum since 2008–that’s a lot of blog posts over the years!
As we moved to Bare Marriage, we were picky about what content we brought over. The post you are looking for didn’t make the cut. However, there are still over 900 posts on this website so I am sure you can find something for your situation here!
Here’s where you can search for specific topics, or else see the latest on the blog:
Recent Posts
How A Comment Thread on A Social Media Post Represents A Masculinity Panic: Let’s Analyze!
Social media comments often give a sobering insight into what men are thinking. And today I'd like to show you what a thematic analysis of social media comments would look like! As you may know, we're quite busy behind the scenes drafting academic papers, some in...
PODCAST: Thalidomide, Bad Christian Marriage Books, and a Jesus Who Laughs
God is not just an angry magazine cover in the sky He's not there saying, "here's 7 ways you could smarten up so you don't disappoint me so much." But that's often how we picture God--so terribly disappointed in us! Today's American Thanksgiving, so lots of my regular...
How Can We Talk about Men’s Sexual Desire in a Healthy Way?
One of the most frequent questions I get from men is this one: How can I get my wife to understand my sexual needs? He feels like he’s in a sex-starved marriage, and he’s desperate for sex. But the more he talks about sex, the more his wife pulls away. What’s the...
Complementarianism’s “Equal but Different Roles” Hypocrisy
With thanks to Zondervan and the book For the Love of Women for sponsoring this post! Complementarianism has a big problem. For those of you who don’t know, complementarianism is the belief that God placed men in authority over women, in marriage and the church (some...
PODCAST: The Problems with Complementarianism in a Nutshell
Complementarians often use pretty words to obscure what they believe. They say things like "men are meant to be the protectors!", or "men bear the burden of responsibility" or "we are all equal, but we just have different roles." But when you break down what they're...
A New Strategic Video Channel to Start Conversations!
How do we get others to see the truth about healthy sex & marriage teaching? It's so hard to break through all the slop that's on social media right now, and there's an uptick in the number of super patriarchal accounts saying really misogynistic things (like...
7 Reasons The Bible Says You Can Divorce for Abuse
Thank you to Zondervan and the book For the Love of Women for sponsoring this post God isn’t glorified when women stay in marriages where they’re abused Too many women have sat across from church leaders, bruised and broken, only to be told they must "bear their...
PODCAST: Francine Rivers’ And the Shofar blew Part 2
Thank you to Zondervan and For the Love of Women for sponsoring this podcast It's the second part of our conversation about Francine Rivers' And the Shofar Blew! (and you can listen to Part 1 here!) Even though I've mostly critiqued nonfiction books, I've had so many...
How Wholly Unqualified People Shaped Evangelical Marriage And Sex Advice–and Still Do!
I've got two case studies of wholly unqualified people giving advice for you today! I’d like to tell you 2 different stories about 2 different influencer duos, 2 decades apart, and then show you how these stories relate to the harm being done in evangelical circles...









