Welcome to our new website!
It looks like you’re trying to find some content that isn’t available anymore. I (Sheila) have been blogging at To Love, Honor and Vacuum since 2008–that’s a lot of blog posts over the years!
As we moved to Bare Marriage, we were picky about what content we brought over. The post you are looking for didn’t make the cut. However, there are still over 900 posts on this website so I am sure you can find something for your situation here!
Here’s where you can search for specific topics, or else see the latest on the blog:
Recent Posts
PODCAST: Happily Never After–The Curious Case of Love and Respect
If Love & Respect is a Multiverse, Then This is Our Endgame Excuse the Marvel reference. I know it has been years since those superhero movies were cool. We’ve been talking since before Avengers: Endgame released about the problems with the book Love and Respect....
Why Emerson Eggerichs’ Love & Respect Presents an Unworkable Dichotomy
It's impossible for Emerson Eggerichs' ideas in Love & Respect to work in practice. Because what he tells men to do and what he tells women to do are completely and utterly mutually exclusive. So something will have to give. And in Eggerichs' world, that's always...
Why It Matters that Jeffrey Epstein Recommended James Dobson
Jeffrey Epstein apparently found James Dobson useful. TW: I will be talking in generic terms about sexual abuse in this article, and mentioning Jeffrey Epstein. And I will be including several snippets from evangelicals that sexualize little girls. Over the weekend,...
PODCAST: To Heal Or Harm–Making Sense of the Weaponized Bible Verses
Scripture can be used to abuse people. But it can also be used to heal! Today Dr. Steven Tracy takes us through some of the most weaponized verses in the Bible against abuse victims, and helps us see clearly how these verses have been misunderstood and misused. And...
What If “Keeping the Peace” Hurts Long-Term?
What if keeping the peace seems safer--but it's actually riskier long-term?Sheila here! Those of you who read the blog regularly, and who follow me on social media, see a lot of my thoughts. But did you know that Rebecca writes the Friday emails that go out to our...
Revisiting Complementarianism and Authoritarianism in Light of Minneapolis
In January of 1994 I went to see Schindler's list in movie theatres. About two hours after watching it I had a miscarriage, losing my first pregnancy. I've always thought somehow the horror of that movie and the miscarriage were linked. One of the scenes that has...
PODCAST: The Complementarian Bar for Men is in the Basement
One of the things that amazes me is that so little is expected of complementarian men. The last few weeks has shown us that in spades, as so many pastors reacted to Philip Yancey's affair by saying, "It could have been any of us," and SBC megachurch pastor Jonathan...
Reading Ephesians 5:21-23 Through Paul’s New-Creation Ethic: An Academic Essay by Liana Cavanaugh
A scholarly look at Ephesians 5 shows that egalitarianism was baked in. I'm going to do something different today. Recently a woman named Liana Cavanaugh sent me an essay that she wrote for a theology degree that she is taking. I was really impressed with the essay,...
What Should We Do With Pastors Who Struggle with Sexual Sin?
We have a crisis in the evangelical church of pastors normalizing sexual sin and the objectification of women. Late last week I started talking about a horrible Facebook live that SBC megachurch pastor Jonathan Pokluda made, where he admitted he wanted to sleep with...