Welcome to our new website!
It looks like you’re trying to find some content that isn’t available anymore. I (Sheila) have been blogging at To Love, Honor and Vacuum since 2008–that’s a lot of blog posts over the years!
As we moved to Bare Marriage, we were picky about what content we brought over. The post you are looking for didn’t make the cut. However, there are still over 900 posts on this website so I am sure you can find something for your situation here!
Here’s where you can search for specific topics, or else see the latest on the blog:
Recent Posts
NEW RESEARCH: Modesty Messages Groom Boys to Become Predators
Teaching modesty messages makes church more dangerous for teen girls. That's what our newest paper, out in the Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion, shows. It's based on our dataset for our book She Deserves Better, and the lead author on it (Nicole Gallego)...
PODCAST: New Research on Modesty Messages, Sexual Harassment in Church, Plus We Answer Your Questions!
We've got a new research paper on modesty messaging coming out! We've been working behind the scenes on a number of different peer reviewed papers, and we have another one to tell you about today regarding modesty messaging and sexual harassment in church. Plus Keith...
Let’s Dissect the Roots of the Duggars’ Pedophilia
Another Duggar son has been charged with sexually abusing a child. This time it’s Joseph Duggar, the seventh born and third son. (I wrote this piece before news broke that his wife Kendra has also been charged with 4 counts of false imprisonment, among other things....
PODCAST: Adult ADHD, Marriage, and Gender Roles!
Let’s talk ADHD and marriage! What does it mean to have realistic expectations of a spouse with ADHD? How does gender play into how ADHD impacts a relationship? And what do accommodations actually look like—versus what do they *not* look like in a healthy marriage? In...
Why Complementarianism Isn’t Actually About Men Really Leading
I've seen so many social media complementarian messages telling women to take the initiative to fix things. One particular one accused women of pride if they saw a problem in the relationship, but then thought: "he's the leader, go fix it." Women were told to take the...
Who Is the Real Victim When Men Lust? Every Man’s Battle Says It’s Men!
Why is lust a sin? That may seem like a silly question, because it's obvious, right? It's LUST. And lust is bad. But seriously--what, specifically, is bad about it? I think that answer really matters, because part of the reason the "all men struggle with lust; it's...
PODCAST: Did Purity Culture Cause Developmental Trauma?
Why do evangelical women see sex as a chore? We're doing a fun podcast today where I'm combining a whole bunch of different things that I've been wanting to talk about, and putting them together so that they tell a consistent story. At least that's the plan! We're...
Defeating Complementarianism Is Not Just an Intellectual Exercise
Preston Sprinkle's new book comes out in favour of egalitarianism! I'm honestly so relieved. I heard about From Genesis to Junia a few months ago, and assumed the worst. He claimed that he was going to take an unbiased look at the scholarship about egalitarianism and...
Why Complementarian Marriages Lose Out on Intimacy
With thanks to Zondervan and the book To Heal or Harm for sponsoring this post.My husband Keith is in the middle of a 4-part series about why complementarianism has such bad outcomes. He started last week looking at the analogy that complementarians often use when...