PODCAST: The Theology of Sex, Keeping Jesus Centre, and More!

by | May 23, 2019 | Uncategorized | 3 comments

Podcast with Sex Ed for Grownups
Merchandise is Here!

What does the penis and clitoris tell us about God? About sex? About how God intended us to relate to each other?

I’ve got a new podcast up! I hope you all will listen, but if you don’t have time, I’ll have some links and rabbit trails below so you can read all you want as well! This week I’ve been summarizing what I’ve been talking about on the blog about the theology of the body, and it’s a really fun one.

And consider this podcast “extras”. If you want to go deeper into what I talked about in the podcast, here are some more things to help you.

But first, here’s the podcast:

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Main Segment: Can we have a theology of the body?

Pope John Paul II famously wrote a theology of the body, and I’ve been trying to give my own take on what our bodies tell us about God, sex, and our relationships with one another.

I really enjoyed recording this one–I hope you’ll listen!

I mentioned a few posts in it that I promised to share:

Millennial Marriage: Who has the best marriage?

We were discussing this article in the New York Times Opinion section about who has the best marriages. It turns out that it’s very strong traditional religious people (which would include Trump Evangelicals, of course, but would also include very religious Jews, Orthodox, Catholics, etc.), but then, at a close second, it’s your progressive secularists. The mushy middle isn’t as happy.

So we’re talking about the factor they found that these two groups have in common, and also how Christians should talk about marriage.

Reader Question: What do you mean by “keeping your head in the game” during sex?

This was a great reader question that I’m sure many of you have. So I got the chance to clear up something that may sound rather confusing:

One time in a different article you stated women need to get their head in the game. I personally find that contrary to just feeling and losing control. I’m in my 50’s and sex has always been extremely difficult for me. I was raised with a negative view of sex. My mind wanders during lovemaking. To keep my head in the game I have fantasized – I know that’s a huge No-No! My husband is dedicated to my pleasure but I have so many issues. I also battle depression and am on an anti-depressant that has killed my libido. But I’m determined to change things for the better. Please advise how a woman can have her head in the game and also “just feel” and lose control. I’m really trying, but it’s forever a challenge. Thanks.”

I think I answered this one well! Have a listen and tell me if you understand the difference.

Comment: 9 Thoughts That Can Change Your Marriage is Truly Profound

Sometimes I get the loveliest and most encouraging emails from people who have read my book, and this is one such email. I just wanted to share it with you:

My girlfriend in Idaho got me hooked up with your website and I’ve been an ardent fan for AT LEAST 5 years. I bought 9 Thoughts  (pre-ordered!) and read it voraciously. Then I promptly ordered multiple copies to be able to share with so many friends and young marrieds whom I’ve been blessed to mentor. I always told women “I’ve done EVERYTHING wrong in my marriage – if I can help you in any way in your marriage with what I’ve learned, it’ll be worth it!”  I’ve read SO MANY marriage books over the years, but far and away the BEST of them all, has been 9 Thoughts. No question. I’ve even told my hubby, I sure wish I’d read this book earlier in our marriage. Truly, Sheila, it is a profound book. Profoundly true and accurate AND profoundly simple to read and follow.  How wonderful that you give “assignments” that are easily accomplished and reap such huge results.  I can’t find all the words to tell you what an incredibly good tool you’ve put into the hands of wives with your book, but I always have at least one extra copy on hand to give away – it’s that good.

That comment was just so lovely to read. I think 9 Thoughts is very different from most marriage books, because I do try to tell women that they can run after God and do what’s right, not just run after what their husbands want. God said that two are better than one, and that means that we need to be fully participating in marriage. I think it’s better to call women to follow Jesus than to follow anyone else. I hope that you’ll pick it up, too!

Are you GOOD or are you NICE?

Because the difference matters!

God calls us to be GOOD, yet too often we’re busy being nice. And sometimes, in marriage, that can actually cause problems to be even more entrenched.

What if there’s a better way?

That’s it for this week! Hope you enjoyed the podcast. I really had fun with it, and it’s fun to do one so focused on sex again, as this one was. Let me know what you think!

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Sheila Wray Gregoire

Author at Bare Marriage

Sheila is determined to help Christians find biblical, healthy, evidence-based help for their marriages. And in doing so, she's turning the evangelical world on its head, challenging many of the toxic teachings, especially in her newest book The Great Sex Rescue. She’s an award-winning author of 8 books and a sought-after speaker. With her humorous, no-nonsense approach, Sheila works with her husband Keith and daughter Rebecca to create podcasts and courses to help couples find true intimacy. Plus she knits. All the time. ENTJ, straight 8

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  1. A

    Thank you I’m a woman in my 40’s unmarried I know nothing about sex due to poor upbringing I have been celibate for over 20 years I realized in my 40 s i began to be aroused in the morning more frequently and at night sometimes throughout the day. I recently had cancer treatment and thought maybe the hormones were responsible but I just wanted to know what was normal and sinful but am afraid to ask. I feel better knowing I’m normal. But I wanted to know what you thought. Am I supposed to be wanting sex all the time now. What’s ok what’s not

  2. Madeline

    Yes! I loved y’all’s millennial marriage segment and the idea that Christians need to be willing to learn from others! I totally agree that just because you’re a Christian doesn’t mean you will have the best everything (marriage, sex life, family life). Don’t get me wrong, I think that if we’re following Jesus’s teachings and being sensitive to the Holy Spirit we should have the best everything, but just because you identify as a Christian doesn’t mean all those things will magically happen! This pride and honestly what I consider to be a disguised laziness (the “I’m a Christian so I don’t need to put extra work into having healthy relationships, a better understanding of x,” attitude..) is such a turn-off to non-Christians who we are meant to witness to, and it robs Christians of the opportunity to have a better, richer, life! I’m not saying this to bash all Christians, and I really do believe in the power of God’s love to change lives above all else, I’m just passionate about this because I grew up around some people who took this thinking to the extreme and I saw how limiting it can be.

    • Sheila Wray Gregoire

      Exactly, Madeline! And I think it’s a very bad image of the gospel. If we’re always saying, “our lives are better than yours”, and they can see that they’re not, then why do they need Christ? The message of the gospel needs to be about God, not about us.


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