When people say they “don’t want” sex tonight, what do they mean? We talked about this on the Bare Marriage podcast last week, but I'd like to elaborate on part of it today. I think we often get confused when people talk about this. They’ll say,“Well, sometimes I have...
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NEW RESEARCH: Women Aren’t Turned On by Husbands Who Act Like Dependents
What happens to women’s desire level if their husbands don’t do housework? This month, our series on the blog is going to focus on some new studies that have recently been published in peer reviewed journals. We like keeping up with research, and we shared four new...
How The Great Sex Rescue Changed This Couple’s Sex Life
Everyday I get emails, comments, and DMs about how our books are changing lives. Before we wrote The Great Sex Rescue and She Deserves Better I had written several other books. But the reaction is so starkly different. I’m hearing over and over again about lives...
How Can the Higher Drive Spouse Avoid Giving the Obligation Sex Message?
Being the higher drive spouse can be really frustrating. You want to connect with your spouse, and you want to have a passionate marriage, but it seems like your spouse doesn't share those same desires. And that can feel like a rejection. This is the last post in the...
10 Ways Men Can Initiate Sex with Their Wives (Without pressuring her)
How do you initiate sex with your wife without turning her off? We've been working through an obligation sex series for the last few weeks, and one of the big things I've been stressing is that making your spouse feel like they are obligated to have sex has disastrous...
What if Recovery from Obligation Sex Seems Impossible?
Obligation sex can wreak havoc on us. For last month we’ve been doing a deep dive into obligation sex, looking at the main problems with obligation sex, how it affects women’s bodies, why you don’t need to consent to being used, and more. But as we’re nearing the end...
Why Obligation Sex Wrecks Your Libido
Can feelings of sexual obligation affect your libido long-term? This month we're talking about obligation sex. We started last week by noting 10 things to understand about obligation sex, when I wrote the definitive post of everything that I tend to talk about with...
Let’s Talk Emotional Labour of Birth Control
Every week I try to create awesome content for you all on the blog and the podcast–and even my social media! But I’ve got to tell you–some of the best content coming out of Bare Marriage is our Friday email that goes out to 46,000 people every week. And I don’t write...
PODCAST: New Research on Obligation Sex
Ready for some new research on orgasm? It's been a while since we shared some new findings in the areas of sex and marriage, and we've been saving new peer reviewed articles and studies to tell you about! Today we thought we'd focus on two that relate to obligation...
What Our Research and the Thalidomide Campaign Have in Common
Why do people hate our research for The Great Sex Rescue so much? Well, really hate our research for everything, including our new book She Deserves Better! Last week, a Twitter storm broke out with me at the center of it. Podcast host Patrick Miller invited Josh...
The Kissing Conundrum: What if Your Husband Has Terrible Hygiene?
Stinky and Kissing don't go together. A while ago I started a series on kissing, and got sidetracked by some huge news stories in evangelicalism (like the terrible article up at The Gospel Coalition, or Jonathan Pokluda objectifying women in a sermon). I have a few...
The Kissing Series: Sometimes Kissing Needs to Just Be Kissing
Sometimes a kiss needs to just be a kiss. Mondays in February are all about kissing, and last week we started our series looking at why kissing sometimes falls by the wayside once you’re married. I listed 7 reasons kissing can stop, and then I asked you all which were...
What Stops You from Treating Your Body as a Friend?
I was not kind to my body yesterday, and I am feeling it! When people used to complain about food insensitivities, I never really understood until it started happening to me. I've been having some real issues with gluten lately, and I've largely gone off of bread. But...