Too many have been taught horrible theology that sin levels. Believers are supposed to have a God who will comfort them when they are betrayed or abused or abandoned. But so much of our theology turns God into someone who doesn't care about our hurts, and is even mad...
Last week we learned that best-selling and beloved author Philip Yancey confessed to an 8-year affair. He announced in a statement he was stepping back from ministry, as he was now disqualified. His wife Janet issued a statement too saying that she was devastated, but...
How do you find the best Bare Marriage episodes? What if you're trying to introduce our podcast to a friend, but you don't know where to start? Or what if you desperately want your husband to listen and understand what you've learned, but it's hard to tell him to...
We don't have to accept pastors demonizing little girls. Recently, I was sent a clip by someone who attends Lake Pointe church and was concerned–I don’t go looking for these. Josh Howerton, you may remember, is the same megachurch pastor who told women to “stand where...
Recently in our Patreon group, a member posted a letter that she’s sending out to the girls (now young women) in a youth group she used to lead, apologizing for teaching toxic things. I thought it was so wonderful I asked if I could run it here. I just want to say:...
What if our deepest wounds drive us to fundamentalism? A few months ago a reader sent me a beautiful story of healing that exemplifies a common dynamic that I see: People who can’t face the wounds they have from childhood often gravitate to a very legalistic form of...
Should we be nuanced about the effects of purity culture? On episode 247 of The Bare Marriage Podcast, we decided to open things up to all of you to ask us anything you’d been dying to ask about sex, marriage, purity culture and everything else related to healthy...
Does abuse show up more in complementarian circles? If you missed episode 246 of the Bare Marriage podcast, you missed out on a great one (and I highly recommend going back to listen when you have a chance!). I had the privilege of sitting down with Bethany Jantzi....
The Excellent Wife is a horribly depressing book to read. It was profoundly heavy and sad. When I started writing these onesheets, they didn’t really affect me that much. Most of the books I was going to be reading were ones I had read already, or were ones I had read...
ONE OF THE THINGS WE’RE PASSIONATE ABOUT ON THIS BLOG IS MAKING SURE THE SELF-HELP AND RELATIONSHIP ADVICE IN THE EVANGELICAL WORLD IS HEALTHY. Over the last few years, our team has surveyed over 32,000 people, measuring how certain teachings common in the evangelical...
When we change our minds, we rarely do it all at once. Over the last decade, Keith and I have changed our minds about a lot of things. But we've done it at different rates, and it's been messy. We're pretty much at the same place today, but in some areas he beat me...
You can’t honor your husband into greatness, people. Do a thought experiment with me today. Imagine that you had recently moved to Louisiana, and you hadn’t made a lot of friends yet. Your kids had been playing with some kids down the street who went to a church...
Can there be justice for how the church has hurt people around marriage & sex? I was thinking about that question yesterday after episode 239 of the Bare Marriage podcast dropped, looking at the phenomenon of deconstruction. Specifically I was thinking about the...
Why do people deconstruct and become exvangelicals? Today on the Bare Marriage podcast author Sarah McCammon, an NPR journalist, joins us to talk about her experience with deconstruction, and what she learned interviewing so many people for her new book explaining the...
I grew up believing God was chronically disappointed in me. I knew He loved me, absolutely. But I also pictured God kind of like a self-help magazine cover: 7 Ways You Could be More Disciplined; 4 Ways You Could Be Getting More Things Done; 3 Ways You Could Stop...