The Excellent Wife is a horribly depressing book to read. It was profoundly heavy and sad. When I started writing these onesheets, they didn’t really affect me that much. Most of the books I was going to be reading were ones I had read already, or were ones I had read...
There are few books as harmful to women as The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace sells like hotcakes in biblical counseling/ fundamentalist/ homeschooling circles, and even though it seems like a “fringe” book, it’s affecting tens of...
ONE OF THE THINGS WE’RE PASSIONATE ABOUT ON THIS BLOG IS MAKING SURE THE SELF-HELP AND RELATIONSHIP ADVICE IN THE EVANGELICAL WORLD IS HEALTHY. Over the last few years, our team has surveyed over 32,000 people, measuring how certain teachings common in the evangelical...
What do you do if your wife tells you that she feels as if she has been raped? Or, if she doesn't use those exact words, if she tells you that she feels as if she's been coerced into sex? We've been talking this month about digging out of the pit that you may have...
What does it mean to be "unwilling" to have sex? We're in the middle of a series on the blog about how to dig out of the pit your sex life is in, when one of you, or both of you, keeps digging that pit deeper. One of the big points I was making is that we cannot...
There is little more devastating to a marriage than rape. This month, on the blog, we're talking about how to recover from sexual problems in your marriage, and I want to spend this week talking about marital rape. On Monday, I talked about the dynamics in evangelical...
Marital rape is the story in all too many Christian marriages. When we analyzed the top 13 evangelical books for our book The Great Sex Rescue, there was one word that was missing from all of them: Consent. While several books did do a good job at talking about the...
Often Christian Marriage teachers say “this is only for spouses in good marriages.” But spouses in destructive marriages listen! Here’s how to help all without harming some.
When churches and denominations deny people the chance to divorce for abuse, they also deny kids the chance to grow up with amazing step-parents. I think we forget that. Those who argue so vehemently that abuse isn't a valid reason for divorce (as Focus on the Family...
A podcast dissecting Dennis Prager’s bad advice about infidelity, and YouTube influencers Paul and Morgan with a case study on body language and identifying unhealthy dynamics.
20 Evangelical Denominations in the United States that do not condone divorce for abuse. Plus information on the effect this has on abuse victims, and how you can help change the policies.
Some pastors are not simply unsafe; they are downright dangerous. And some church elder's boards, church's women's ministries, and denominations in general are downright dangerous. We had a horrible example of that earlier this month when John Piper posted a terrible...
How do you know if you're being abused? One of the hardest parts of blogging is reading so many heartbreaking emails and comments that come in from people in truly destructive marriages. I find myself wondering, why do people treat each other this way? And even more...
We're in the middle of our Marriage Misdiagnosis series, talking about how often the church misdiagnoses the problems in marriage--and so offers the wrong solutions. Last week we looked at how often people are pressured to reconcile before trust has been rebuilt....
What if Christian marriage books are telling you that your destructive marriage is normal? We're in the middle of Marriage Misdiagnosis month, where we're looking at how some of the messages given in evangelical marriage books actually talk about marriage problems...