There's been a horrible meme circulating about how God used David--so we should rejoice when God uses evil men. I've seen it myself; it's been shared and debated in our Patreon group; and so many of you have sent it to me. While it does have immediate American...
We don't have to accept pastors demonizing little girls. Recently, I was sent a clip by someone who attends Lake Pointe church and was concerned–I don’t go looking for these. Josh Howerton, you may remember, is the same megachurch pastor who told women to “stand where...
Remember Bill Clinton and it depends on the definition of "is"? In the 90s, in the middle of the Monica Lewinsky scandal (which, in retrospect, is so full of uneven power dynamics), Bill Clinton denied having an affair based on a silly definition. And, because of...
There is little more devastating to a marriage than rape. This month, on the blog, we're talking about how to recover from sexual problems in your marriage, and I want to spend this week talking about marital rape. On Monday, I talked about the dynamics in evangelical...
Marital rape is the story in all too many Christian marriages. When we analyzed the top 13 evangelical books for our book The Great Sex Rescue, there was one word that was missing from all of them: Consent. While several books did do a good job at talking about the...
Often Christian Marriage teachers say “this is only for spouses in good marriages.” But spouses in destructive marriages listen! Here’s how to help all without harming some.
When churches and denominations deny people the chance to divorce for abuse, they also deny kids the chance to grow up with amazing step-parents. I think we forget that. Those who argue so vehemently that abuse isn't a valid reason for divorce (as Focus on the Family...
A podcast dissecting Dennis Prager’s bad advice about infidelity, and YouTube influencers Paul and Morgan with a case study on body language and identifying unhealthy dynamics.
20 Evangelical Denominations in the United States that do not condone divorce for abuse. Plus information on the effect this has on abuse victims, and how you can help change the policies.
Some pastors are not simply unsafe; they are downright dangerous. And some church elder's boards, church's women's ministries, and denominations in general are downright dangerous. We had a horrible example of that earlier this month when John Piper posted a terrible...
How do you know if you're being abused? One of the hardest parts of blogging is reading so many heartbreaking emails and comments that come in from people in truly destructive marriages. I find myself wondering, why do people treat each other this way? And even more...
We're in the middle of our Marriage Misdiagnosis series, talking about how often the church misdiagnoses the problems in marriage--and so offers the wrong solutions. Last week we looked at how often people are pressured to reconcile before trust has been rebuilt....
What if Christian marriage books are telling you that your destructive marriage is normal? We're in the middle of Marriage Misdiagnosis month, where we're looking at how some of the messages given in evangelical marriage books actually talk about marriage problems...
Sheila here! When I was planning last week's podcast looking at how the authors and organizations that we critiqued in The Great Sex Rescue had responded to our book, I started making a list of all the things that they had acccused us of. By the end of that effort, I...
We know that women have a huge problem with sexual shame. Many men do, too, of course! But let's stick with women for a moment here, because when we were reading best-selling books to see trends of how they taught about sex, we noticed a pattern: Quite often men were...