What if there's a thread running through obligation sex and normalizing men's lust? Or rather, what if there are multiple threads? When we wrote The Great Sex Rescue, based on our surveys of 20,000 women, we identified four big teachings about sex that are common in...
Sheila here! Recently I saw a great post on Instagram by my friend Shari Smith, who handles a lot of my social media behind the scenes (she’s been a big help with my Facebook page getting hacked this week–PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE follow our new page!). Shari wrote a...
Seven summers ago I told the truth about lust for the first time. I broke with the program. Up until then, my main focus on the blog had been how to have a good marriage and how to have a good sex life. But in June of 2017, I wrote a week on the blog about the...
Have you ever noticed that when we talk about oral sex in the Christian community, we usually frame it as something he wants and she should give? In that now infamous Edinburgh sermon that went viral, for instance, Mark Driscoll talked about how a woman should...
I've often said that the higher drive wife carries a lot of burdens that other permutations of libido do not. It can be very difficult to be a husband married to a woman who doesn't want sex, but at least that's culturally expected. As a woman, we grow up hearing how...
The way we feel about our bodies can cause our libido to crater. And when you feel schlubby (I love that word!), it's hard to want to get it on. I get the best stuff sent to me from readers, and last week a reader passed along an article from the Wall Street Journal...
There's a very line between way TMI and just sharing educational information. And in today's Start Your Engines Podcast (we like to take the last Thursday of every month and dedicate it to a podcast that men would be interested in as well), we try to show how men and...
With thanks to Femallay, our sponsor for the sexual confidence series. I hate hot flashes. Even your hands sweat. The back of your neck gets clammy. You want to strip in public–which is generally not a good idea. You start to forget things. I’m starting to make...
What do you do when you're told that it's your Christian duty to act like porn for your husband? Many of you have really enjoyed hearing Andrew Bauman on the Bare Marriage podcast. He's the co-founder and co-director of the Christian Counseling Center for Sexual...
If you've been constantly betrayed in your marriage, how can you ever have sexual confidence again? We're in a sexual confidence series for October and November, where we've been talking about what sexual confidence looks like--and how to develop it. I was going to...
So you all have such wonderful wisdom that I thought I'd ask you today for some ideas! First off, a woman wrote me with a question that I'd never considered before. You know how some people throw "Period Parties" for their daughters when they get their first periods...
One of the reasons women often struggle with sexual confidence is that we think that sex is something that we give to men. We think that sex is primarily a male need (after all, in Love & Respect, Emerson Eggerichs said, "If your husband is typical, he has a need...
Last week we were talking about how neuroscience does NOT say that men and women are different species when it comes to sex. Rebecca and Connor talked on the Bare Marriage podcast last week about how we've been told by many evangelical authors that neuroscience shows...
How do you know if a book is using junk science to prove a point? I thought I'd combine last week's podcast on a DIY test to see if Christian books are harmful or helpful and this week's podcast on the problems with the way that far too many Christian resources misuse...
Are you making sex harder than it needs to be in your marriage? We're in the middle of our doing marriage on hard mode series, and today we're talking about doing sex on hard mode! (and, yes, I know that's a double entendre). We've got a lighthearted look via...