Every week I try to create awesome content for you all on the blog and the podcast–and even my social media! But I’ve got to tell you–some of the best content coming out of Bare Marriage is our Friday email that goes out to 46,000 people every week. And I don’t write...
All the Latest from "Sex"
The Obligation Sex Series
- 10 Things to Know about Obligation Sex
- Why Obligation Sex Destroys Libido (and how it affects us long-term) (coming soon)
- A Way Forward to Recovery from Obligation Sex (coming soon)
- You Don’t Need to Consent to Being Used (coming soon)
- When Your Husband Won’t Let go of Obligation Sex (coming soon)
- The Obligation Sex podcast (coming soon)
Previous Posts on Obligation Sex
- Can We Honor our Bodies’ Rhythms?
- Does 1 Corinthians 7 Mean that Women Have No Sexual Autonomy?
- What Happens When Men Believe the Obligation Sex Message?
Previous Podcasts on Obligation Sex
- New Research on the effects of Obligation Sex
- The Myth of the Magic Penis
- Marital Rape, Consent, and the Problems with Obligation Sex
Plus please see our Great Sex Rescue Toolkit for handy downloads about the effects of obligation sex that you can give to your pastor, counselor, small group leader–anyone who teaches it!
And see chapters 9 and 10 in The Great Sex Rescue for all our charts, stats, and commentary!
The Sexual Recovery Series–Digging Yourself out of the Pit
- A 4 -Point Plan to Sexual Recovery
- Redefining Sex: Seeing Sex as an Expression of your Relationship, Not an Individual Need
- What Sexual Recovery Looks Like
- Safety and Intimacy: You’ll Never Have an Intimate Sex Life without Feeling Safe First
- When Sex Has Become One-Sided, Leaving Her Feeling Used
- 8 Step Plan to Regain Sexual Autonomy
- Why You Need to Deal with Your Own Sexual Stuff
- When Your Spouse Won’t Change
Marital Rape Posts:
- 2 Kinds of Marital Rape
- How to Recover from Marital Rape (if it’s possible)
- Why Christians Often Don’t Understand Consent
- 5 Next Steps if You Realize You’ve Coerced Your Wife into Sex
- Does 1 Corinthians 7 Mean that She Has No Sexual Autonomy?
- How Do I Get My Husband to Understand He’s Been Coercing Me into Sex?
- PODCAST: A Path forward Addressing Sexual Shame (with Jay Stringer)
- PODCAST: The Myth of the Magic Penis (and a call for integrated sex)
- PODCAST: Learned Helplessness and Sex
Keith’s Danvers Statement Series
Looking at the 4 ways those who believe in hierarchy in marriage think marriage can go wrong
- Domination: Do hierarchalists take it seriously?
- Passivity: Is it the problem hierarchalists say it is?
- Usurpation: Behold the circular logic!
- Servility: When every problem is a nail
- And our PODCAST summarizing the whole series!
Plus see the book Keith co-authored with Sheila, The Good Guy’s Guide to Great Sex!
The Research Deep Dive Series
- Does Sex Start in the Kitchen or Does It Die There?
- How Does a Couple’s First Time Affect Libido?
- Is “All Men Struggle With Lust” a Primal Fear?
- Is She Dressing for Attention or is He?
- PODCAST: Ogling and Dressing for Attention
- 5 Questions to Ask That Minimize Bias When Discussing Research
- 10 Things to Know About Hormones and Libido
- Bring Back Vanilla Sex
The Marriage Misdiagnosis Series
- I’ve Figured Out Why Christian Marriage Advice Can Be So Shallow
- Why Elevating Commitment As the Answer to Everything Misses the Point
- 4 Things Christian Marriage Teachers Need to Stop Saying
- Who is the Focus of Most Marriage Teaching?
- PODCAST with Natalie Hoffman: An example of marriage misdiagnosis in real life
- PODCAST: The Marriage Misdiagnosis Podcast
- Are We Putting Reconciliation Before Rebuilding Trust?
- Does It Really Take Two to Tango?
- Should We Always Put the Husband Before the Kids?
- Why Holding Up Radical Stories of Marriage Restoration Can Harm More than Hurt
- If I Pray Hard Enough, Will God Heal My Marriage?
- I Followed Christian Marriage Advice about Genders–and I Failed My Husband
And please check out our book The Great Sex Rescue about all the ways that evangelicalism has given the wrong diagnosis about sex!
Older posts from "Sex"
I’ve had some interesting discussions about how I’m shaming men with sex addictions by calling out the language Every Man’s Battle uses about women. This week we published our one sheet downloadwith the summary of issues with Every Man’s Battle (we also have one for...
Last week, there was a Twitter dust-up because megachurch pastor Jonathan Pokluda objectified women in a sermon. The clip went viral, and this tweet by @laurchastain22 (Lauren Chastain) made huge splashes among Christians:I'm so pleased that Baptist News allowed me to...
Sometimes a kiss needs to just be a kiss. Mondays in February are all about kissing, and last week we started our series looking at why kissing sometimes falls by the wayside once you’re married. I listed 7 reasons kissing can stop, and then I asked you all which were...
What's Wrong with Vanilla Sex? Valentine's Day is coming up just around the corner, and that means that we're going to start to see lots and lots of articles about how to have hot sex. They will be on magazines. They will be in Christian media. How can you have the...
We need to deal with our double standards of sexual expectations in marriage. This month we're looking at entitlement in marriage, and how the entitlement mentality can kill a marriage. One of the things we were talking about last week was that reasonable expectations...
Christian leaders should not be trying to convince women to send nude photos. This doesn't seem like it should even have to be said, but earlier this week I put up a Fixed It for You of Gary Thomas' and Debra Fileta's book Married Sex, which had this sentence: Here's...
We all want amazing lives filled with joy and passion and wholeness. Who wouldn't want that? But too often that is not what people experience. I've been sitting in my yellow chair trying to write the final post for our "digging yourself out of the pit" series, and...
When we're trying to get out of the pit our sex life is in--sometimes we're the one who needs to grab the ladder. We're near the end of our series on getting our sex life out of the pit that one--or both--of us have dug for ourselves. Often the issues are...
Were you ever told as a teen that if you have sex with someone, you will bond with them? That if you have sex you will feel so bonded that it will be hard to ever bond with anyone else again? And that when we have sex, we release the bonding hormone oxytocin? What...
If we want sex to be awesome, then we need to be able to feel like sex is for us too. We need to feel like we matter. Sex is supposed to be mutual, intimate, and pleasurable for both, and mutuality and intimacy means that you are both coming to the bedroom willingly,...
It's the podcast where we redefine sex--and talk about how it's about more than the penis! Today on the podcast I'm introducing the series we've been going through this month on the blog--how to recover when one of you, or both of you, have dug your sex life into a...
I was not kind to my body yesterday, and I am feeling it! When people used to complain about food insensitivities, I never really understood until it started happening to me. I've been having some real issues with gluten lately, and I've largely gone off of bread. But...