Why are we asking women to choose between being a wife and being a mom? One of the themes that pops up often in evangelical marriage literature is warnings to women not to be a mom first and a wife second. It's in almost all of Gary Thomas' books. I used to teach it!...
Let men be dads! It's our third podcast in our let men be men series, and we're finishing that up today with a bang! We often get accused of hating men, which is funny, because we believe men are amazing! Men can be totally emotionally healthy. Men have the Holy...
I’m finding the new trend of tradwife influencers rather distressing. You know those accounts--that hearken back the 1950s housewife, and espouse a life where the husband brings home the paycheque, makes the decisions, and is in authority of the wife, while she does...
Let's use a real-life example of purity culture double standards: Brio Magazine Yesterday on the podcast Rebecca and I read excerpts from old copies of Focus on the Family's Brio magazine, aimed at teen girls 12-16. We wanted you to hear first hand what purity culture...
It's our 200th episode! And we wanted to celebrate by doing something that matters to Rebecca--and to so many of you. We wanted to read some back issues of Brio Magazine, the magazine for preteen and teen girls published by Focus on the Family that encapsulated purity...
She should know that Jesus is not a Jealous Boyfriend. In our book She Deserves Better, we have 32 headings that start "She Should Know..." 32 things that girls need to know, in the very fiber of their being, to dispel a lot of the harmful things we too often have...
Are we missing something if we save kissing for marriage? One of the tenets of purity culture was that all physical contact--even kissing--should be saved for marriage. It wasn't just that sex is for marriage. It was that kissing was too. Some couples didn't even...
When you're a teen, it's normal to have sexual feelings. In fact, sexual feelings are a normal part of life for adults too! We have sex dreams (the content of which can sometimes be quite alarming). We can feel attraction to people. We can feel "horny", for lack of a...
Every Young Man’s Battle is the only book I ever reviewed that made me weep. Perhaps it’s because I read it after I had already read a whole bunch of books aimed at teen girls, and it was just the straw that broke the camel’s back. But I think there was a whole other...
"How do I talk to a woman about what she's wearing?" I've received a number of social media messages from women lately asking how to approach a woman about her clothing choices. In some cases it's been a work situation. In others a ministry situation. In several...
What exactly does "purity culture" refer to? Our recent book She Deserves Better spends about half of its pages addressing many aspects of purity culture, that was so common in youth groups between 1995-2015, and shows how it deviated from the gospel and from what we...
I've been doing so many interviews for our new book She Deserves Better! I wanted a place where I can put the links to those podcasts, because so many of you have been asking for a list. When I do an interview on ANOTHER podcast, I tend to summarize the book quite...
Not every girl has an equal chance of growing up and marrying an abuser. The family circumstances and social environment she grows up in can greatly impact her chances. And these things are, to a certain extent, out of our control. But there are things that are even...
What happens when teenage girls don't understand consent and coercion? They often blame themselves for their own date rape. In our consent chapter for She Deserves Better, we told Kay's story--that all too many of you will relate to. Kay was making out with her...
In She Deserves Better, we include headings listing what girls deserve to know. And they're dynamite! It's now one week since She Deserves Better has launched! It's been a wild week, and we're so excited with how well the book is selling. We've had even more requests...