Remember Bill Clinton and it depends on the definition of "is"? In the 90s, in the middle of the Monica Lewinsky scandal (which, in retrospect, is so full of uneven power dynamics), Bill Clinton denied having an affair based on a silly definition. And, because of...
Sheila here! Last week, Bethany Jantzi joined us on the Bare Marriage podcast to talk about how the elements of coercive control are actually found in the marital dynamics that so much of our evangelical marriage advice creates. Which is horrifying! At the end of the...
Jesus would never have called a child an “enemy.” Yet that’s exactly what Josh Howerton did in a sermon on August 11, when he was telling men to fight for their families. I was sent this clip by someone who attends Lake Pointe church and was concerned–I don’t go...
You've likely heard of the "Bear or Man?" Test If you were alone in the woods, would you rather come across a bear, or a man? It's been taking social media by storm, and women overwhelmingly have answered "bear", which has made many men angry. The reasons women have...
Some awfully bizarre things happened at the recent Strong Men’s Conference–and Jezebel made an appearance. I don’t even know where to begin, and I don’t want to talk about the conference itself because so many have already done a good job. To sum up, there was one of...
When you've been raised to submit, will you even recognize abuse? With thanks to the NIV Kingdom Girls Bible for sponsoring this podcast! Today on the Bare Marriage podcast, we've got such a compelling interview with Lauren Rose from Called to Peace Ministries. She's...
with thanks to Brazos Press and the book Forgiveness After Trauma for sponsoring this post. Divorce is one of the most painful things a person can go through. But often, right when people need help the most, the church abandons them. A few weeks ago on the Bare...
Accountability is a necessary part of forgiveness and reconciliation. And yet often it’s downplayed, where even asking for accountability is somehow proof that you haven’t forgiven. Over the last few weeks we’ve been walking through some amazing truths from Susannah...
With thanks to Brazos Press for sponsoring this post. Forgiveness is possible only after we’ve had the opportunity to name our losses. That’s how Susannah Griffith opens the chapter on lamentations in her book Forgiveness After Trauma. We talked about the book on the...
Why does our doctrine of forgiveness and healing often cause so much pain? We’re told the problem is our hearts, that we’re just bitter. But what if it’s not that? What if our teaching on forgiveness has gotten things all wrong? This week, on the podcast, I introduced...
What if...the people we listen to for advice are more likely to be being abused? And what if the couples held up as ones to emulate by organizations like Focus on the Family are actually in really destructive relationships? This was a sad one for me to record, because...
Focus on the Family wants women to believe that if they pray, men jailed for domestic violence can change. Just before Christmas, on December 19, something super strange happened on the Focus on the Family Facebook Page. They shared this story:"My marriage was over....
Are women getting divorced frivolously, for no reason? For some reason, there’s been a big uptick in social media accounts quoting two statistics: Women initiate 70% of divorces 75% of women cite lack of commitment as the reason for divorce The commentary around this...
Are women divorcing left and right for no reason? Lately I've seen an uptick on social media sharing two "facts": Women initiate 70% of divorces In 75% of those divorces, "lack of commitment" is the reason for divorce The conclusion being made is that women are fickle...
Divorced women are not finding evangelical churches to be welcoming places. Despite the fact that many women endured years of trying to make their marriage work even in the presence of their husband’s abuse, infidelity, or substance abuse, when the divorce is...