How do you have great sex when it’s hot outside and you have no air conditioning?
We talk a lot about making sex great here on the blog, and this month we want to focus on giving you some helpful and practical tips to help you make sex even better in your marriage!
Last week we talked about how to actually go about trying new positions and switching things up, but what about when it’s just to hot to even want to have sex? Sex in the summer can be sticky, sweaty, and just plain uncomfortable if you’re in a home without air conditioning in the middle of a heat wave.
But that doesn’t mean you should give up on great sex in the summer–here are 10 practical ways to help you beat the heat between the sheets!
Summer Sex Tip 1: Start in the shower
If you enjoy shower sex as a couple, then by all means just put a nice cool shower and enjoy feeling cool while you make love!
But even if you don’t like full-on shower sex, try starting out in a cool shower. This will give you a chance to hug, kiss, and engage in foreplay all while staying cool so that the amount of time spent having sex in a hot bedroom is nice and short, but your entire experience can be long enough to be enjoyable for both!
Summer Sex Tip 2: Use a number of fans
Ideally, you want to create a cross-breeze so that one spouse doesn’t accidentally block the cool air and the other is left in sweltering heat.
Pointing two different fans at the bed can keep sex from becoming too sticky and keep you far more comfortable!
(As a bonus, this acts as a great white noise machine, too, that keeps any sounds you make from reaching kids’ or teenagers’ ears!)
Want some fun ways to spice things up this summer?
Summer Sex Tip 3: Keep your hair tied up
If either or both of you has long hair, keep it tied up during sex to stay comfortable in the heat. It can be difficult to stay in the zone when you feel really gross because your hair is sticking to your neck. So grab a hair tie and keep it out of the way.
Summer Sex Tip 4: Try positions where you’re not embracing
Last week we talked about practical ways to try new positions in the moment during sex, so why not give some of those tips a try to find some variations on your favourite positions so you don’t have to be fully on top of each other as much?
If you’re used to having sex chest-to-chest, you could try a more heat-friendly sex position by having him sit up while she is on her back so that you are at a right-angle to each other. Or you could try having sex with him behind her, so that both people can be elevated off the bed–him on his knees and her on her hands and knees.
There are tons of different positions that can work for you–if like finishing off sex with a closer position where you can embrace go ahead and do that! But if you’re finding that it’s just too hot to use that position the whole time, why not switch it up until the end?
Summer Sex Tip 5: Have sex in the early morning or late at night
Let’s be honest, summer is just hot. But there are times of day where the heat is less intense, or the humidity may not have set in yet.
If sex has been difficult because of the heat, try waking up a bit earlier in the morning so you can enjoy some morning sex before the day gets too hot. Or why not keep your evenings free from plans so you can have the time to enjoy each other after the sun has gone down?
Figure out what time of day works best for you to have sex and then schedule it in and make it a priority!
Summer Sex Tip 6: Use breathable fabrics in linens and blankets
Linens and blankets may be the last thing you’re thinking of when it comes to sex in the summer heat. But what you’re lying on impacts how hot you’ll feel! If you’re using synthetic blends for your sheets or blankets, consider swapping them out for bamboo or cotton replacements. These will do a better job of regulating temperature and wicking sweat off of you and your spouse so that you feel less sweaty and sticky.
As a result, you’ll feel cooler than if you’re on a mound of polyester blends! This doesn’t need to be expensive, either–many thrift stores are filled with cotton sheets and blankets for hardly any money. So look for some thin sheets and blankets with breathable fabrics to help keep the bed cool.
Learn Great Sex Tips!
Summer Sex Tip 7: Reconsider being naked
This may seem counter-intuitive–if the problem is that you are too hot, why would you want to keep clothes ON?!
But here’s the thing: the problem with the heat during summer is that you sweat. And when you sweat a lot, you tend to feel sticky and you tend to stick more to the other person. And that sticking makes you sweat more. And then you just feel gross and like you don’t want to have sex anymore.
If the sticking-to-each-other feeling bothers you, consider keeping on a lightweight cotton shirt or piece of looser lingerie in a breathable fabric that can act as a sweat-wicking buffer. Alternatively, get completely naked but keep a sheet between your bellies and chests so that you can be close but not feel sticky.
Summer Sex Tip 8: Use your hands
Sex doesn’t just need to mean penis-in-vagina-sex. Having time to be sexual together can include other methods, which can be much more enjoyable when it’s blazing hot outside. Getting naked together and using your hands to bring each other to orgasm can be incredibly intimate and also much more comfortable if the heat is just too much for both of you.
Don’t be afraid to try new things during the summer months. Fool around while you’re in a cool bath together, touch each other in bed, figure out what makes the other person feel good. Besides, then when you do have intercourse later, you’ll know even more what makes your spouse “tick”!
Summer Sex Tip 9: Find the coolest spot in the house
Does your home or apartment have one room that is typically cooler than the others? Do you have a guest room in the basement that is usually left untouched? Or maybe the office in the back of the apartment that doesn’t have as many windows tends to stay cooler, even in the middle of August. Why not use those rooms for sex during the summer heat?
Bring some blankets and pillows if necessary, and utilize the cooler areas of your home!
Summer Sex Tip 10: Use it as an excuse for a romantic getaway
If at the end of the day you just really really struggle to enjoy sex during the summer, why not book yourself a weekend getaway just the two of you? If it’s in the budget, find a cute bed & breakfast with air conditioning and plan an amazing second honeymoon for halfway through the summer. It’ll give you a great “reset” after a few weeks of dealing with the summer heat, and you’ll be reinvigorated to try to make it work for the rest of the summer!
What are some of your best tips for having great sex even if you don’t have air conditioning? Share them in the comments below!
Read the rest of our Practical Sex Series:
- How to Try New Positions–Without Needing an Instructions Manual!
- How to Have Great Sex Without Air Conditioning (This one!)
- How to Get More Adventurous In Bed (July 17)
- Your Guide to Choosing Lingerie (July 24)
- How to Sync Your Libidos (July 31)
Ha! This reminds me of our honeymoon. We took a minimoon after our wedding and then a longer honeymoon a year later, but we went to a place that was super hot and humid (oops) and got a place without AC (double oops). Let’s just say sex wasn’t happening much.
Doable for one week, but harder when it’s a summer–we lived in a single wide for a year that was like an oven in summer, and it didn’t cool down till well past midnight, even with fans running. By cool down I mean under 80. I was so miserable I couldn’t even deal with him putting his hand on my shoulder, lol. Definitely wasn’t the best sex I’ve ever had, that’s for sure…
Oh my word! Yeah that sounds pretty uncomfortable. 🙂 Connor and I lived in an apartment with no AC on the 4th floor in a building with zero air flow at all. Plus none of our windows faced the way the wind was blowing, so opening windows didn’t do anything. We ended up just rotating frozen cloths in the freezer after the first few weeks so we’d always have something cold to put on our necks!
Oh man, that sounds miserable too! I think that was the weirdest thing about the place–the trailer had tons of windows and they were perfectly placed for crossbreezes throughout the house, but there was never any air moving. It was just so weird.
We did the wet cloth thing too though. It really does help!
We just got AC put in this year and it’s been wonderful. Where was this article before that?
I think I’d just recommend a portable air conditioner- unlike a window unit, they’re easy to put in and take out (with no danger of them falling out). Just run the exhaust to the window, plug it in, and let it rip. One does have to drain the water tank every so often (more if it’s humid too), but it’s also easy to store when the temperatures drop to more reasonable levels.
I must admit, though, I never thought of one being a “marital aid.”
Yeah portable air conditioners can be amazing, but many people who live in places without AC can’t afford to buy a good air conditioning unit as they are often quite expensive. I know that was my husband and my case when we were in an apartment with no AC! So if you can afford it, DEFINITELY worth the investment. Otherwise, I hope these tips can help! 🙂
Basements are much cooler in the summer so thats my 2 cents and although it was mentioned in the post I think it should be top on the list if you got one. In addition you forgot to mention ice! Fooling around with ice if your spouse is up to it would certainly help keep you cool!
Hi from Brisbane Australia (missed you in Toowoomba 😞). I have several wraps from islands that are cotton and some very pretty. I lay them on the centre of the bed, either way, and lightly spray them with perfume. If we are going to be sweaty, then I do t feel I have to change the bed linen as much.