"So you think it's okay if women just don't have sex, then?" Whenever we talk about how sex should be mutual, intimate, and pleasurable for both, and that the obligation sex message is toxic, the reply we get is something along these lines--without obligation,...
The 72 Hour Rule is Made Up by Evangelical Authors. Yep. This month on the blog we're "fact checking" common sex beliefs, and one of the biggest ones in evangelical circles is the 72 hour rule: the idea that a wife must have sex with her husband every 72 hours,...
What happens to women’s desire level if their husbands don’t do housework? This month, our series on the blog is going to focus on some new studies that have recently been published in peer reviewed journals. We like keeping up with research, and we shared four new...
For every guy who has ever thought, "my wife hates sex," or, even worse, "my wife hates ME," I want to point you to some practical solutions. Usually I write this blog for women, but I do have a fair number of men who read it, and I get emails all the time from men...
It's the wrap up podcast for our What's Killing Women's Libido series! At the end of the month we like to record a podcast that's a little more aimed at men, and today we thought we'd wrap up what can cause women's libidos to plummet--and what men can do about it!...
Adults need bedtimes, too. Seriously. I have talked to thousands of couples over the last few years at marriage conferences and at events, and I keep hearing stories about how "we never talk", or "we never do anything together", or even, "our sex life is almost...
For so many of us, sex is the greatest source of tension in our marriage. Now, sometimes it's for nefarious reasons, like a husband who uses pornography (or a wife who uses pornography). Sometimes there has been major betrayal, or the marriage is just really on the...
Just because you have a responsive libido doesn't mean you don't have a libido! I make this point repeatedly in our revamped Boost Your Libido course that launches next Monday, but I really want to drive this home today: Just because you don't have what we call a...
Sex is supposed to be a great gift from God--and most of us would love to experience it as that great gift! But often we never seem to want it. We want to want it--but our bodies don't seem to cooperate. Our minds don't seem to cooperate. We wish we could feel more...
Let's talk about what influences your felt libido--what triggers you to want sex, and what triggers you to not want sex. We're starting our "What's Killing Women's Libido"? series, and on Monday we launched it looking at 15 things that can kill a woman's libido. Those...
Welcome to the "what's killing women's libido?" series! In the month of June I want to look at some of the reasons that women's libido is often so low, and look at what we can do about that. Now, I know that many of you reading this blog have the opposite...
If you think 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 is a command for women to have sex on demand with their husbands, you've lost the plot. And not just that, but you have no business leading an SBC (Southern Baptist Convention) seminary where future SBC pastors are trained. But that's...
What if male Christian authors are digging the very hole they're trying to climb out of--and killing women's libido? Welcome to June, everybody! And in June, our focus is going to be on libido, asking the question: "What's killing women's libido?" Now, I know there's...
Just a super quick post today on why "equality" sometimes misses the boat when it comes to sexual pleasure. I use Tuesdays either to take a day off from writing the blog, or to share something super quick that's on my mind and I just want to write it out. I'm hoping...
For the last three years I've been trying to change the evangelical conversation about sex. I've been pointing out how we went so very far off track with so much of our messaging in our best-sellers--focusing on men's satisfaction and ignoring women's; seeing sex as a...