Steve Arterburn and Fred Stoeker ignore abuse victims in Every Man's Battle. They never talk about the reality of sexual abuse, or acknowledge that a man's lust and sexual behavior can deeply injure women. Instead, they portray the victim when men lust as the man...
Why is lust a sin? That may seem like a silly question, because it's obvious, right? It's LUST. And lust is bad. But seriously--what, specifically, is bad about it? I think that answer really matters, because part of the reason the "all men struggle with lust; it's...
Why do evangelical women see sex as a chore? We're doing a fun podcast today where I'm combining a whole bunch of different things that I've been wanting to talk about, and putting them together so that they tell a consistent story. At least that's the plan! We're...
Is there really such a thing as “blue balls”? This month I want to start a new series on the blog called “Fact Checked it For You”, where we look up some of the most common outrageous claims made about sex, and see if they actually stand up to scrutiny. We’ll be...
What happens to women’s desire level if their husbands don’t do housework? This month, our series on the blog is going to focus on some new studies that have recently been published in peer reviewed journals. We like keeping up with research, and we shared four new...
Sheila here! As we've been talking this week about new research showing that for many women, sex is like ChefBoyardee ravioli out of a can, I thought I could give you some hope that women can experience Nonna's ravioli too! I receieved this from a reader, and I...
Everyday I get emails, comments, and DMs about how our books are changing lives. Before we wrote The Great Sex Rescue and She Deserves Better I had written several other books. But the reaction is so starkly different. I’m hearing over and over again about lives...
Being the higher drive spouse can be really frustrating. You want to connect with your spouse, and you want to have a passionate marriage, but it seems like your spouse doesn't share those same desires. And that can feel like a rejection. This is the last post in the...
How do you initiate sex with your wife without turning her off? We've been working through an obligation sex series for the last few weeks, and one of the big things I've been stressing is that making your spouse feel like they are obligated to have sex has disastrous...
Sex matters in marriage. When sex is mutual, intimate, and pleasurable for both, sex makes you feel connected. It minimizes minor tensions and makes you laugh. It helps you sleep and makes you feel more relaxed. And it contributes significantly to marital...
Obligation sex can wreak havoc on us. For last month we’ve been doing a deep dive into obligation sex, looking at the main problems with obligation sex, how it affects women’s bodies, why you don’t need to consent to being used, and more. But as we’re nearing the end...
More sex does not fix a marriage. In our study of 20,000 women for The Great Sex Rescue, we found that more sex made good marriages great. Good sex, in a healthy marriage, definitely helps that marriage thrive. But sex can’t fix a bad marriage. And, indeed, having bad...
Should women get to have a say in when they have sex? I would think that the answer to this is pretty obvious. I don't have time for a long post today, but I want to talk about a social media trend that's been occurring, I think because of my obligation sex series. ...
Is there a way forward after obligation sex? If obligation sex has been the norm in your marriage, and if it's been affecting your libido and your marriage, what do you actually do about it? How do you recover from it? This month on the blog we've been looking at...
Can feelings of sexual obligation affect your libido long-term? This month we're talking about obligation sex. We started last week by noting 10 things to understand about obligation sex, when I wrote the definitive post of everything that I tend to talk about with...