The strangest thing about watching Netflix’s Death of a Pastor’s Wife is how familiar it all feels. Our family has been attending an Anglican Church since COVID ended. We haven’t been in a typical evangelical church for over 7 years. We left because of trauma and...
One of the most common pieces of marriage advice you’ll hear in evangelical circles is “your husband comes before the kids.” It’s constant, and we’re always reminded that one day the kids will leave home, but your husband will still be there. He needs to be the...
Is the aim of complementarianism to give men leadership over women? Most complementarians would eventually say yes, even if reluctantly. They would say that God calls men to headship over women, which means that men have to be willing to lead their wives--which is a...
Too many have been taught horrible theology that sin levels. Believers are supposed to have a God who will comfort them when they are betrayed or abused or abandoned. But so much of our theology turns God into someone who doesn't care about our hurts, and is even mad...
Last week we learned that best-selling and beloved author Philip Yancey confessed to an 8-year affair. He announced in a statement he was stepping back from ministry, as he was now disqualified. His wife Janet issued a statement too saying that she was devastated, but...
How do you find the best Bare Marriage episodes? What if you're trying to introduce our podcast to a friend, but you don't know where to start? Or what if you desperately want your husband to listen and understand what you've learned, but it's hard to tell him to...
Safety is the precursor to everything that helps us thrive. Often as the year changes I spend some time between Christmas and New Year's in contemplation and listening, trying to discern what's important to concentrate on in the year ahead. You've all likely seen the...
We're coming full circle for the last podcast of 2025! We started this "season" (I never know how to count the seasons really!) since we came back from summer break talking about right wing authoritarianism, and how it overlaps almost completely with religious...
The Christmas story brings peace to me when people refuse to hear the truth. It's my last post of 2025, and I've been a little quieter lately, having some time to think and process. And as I've shared at Christmas over the last few years, one of the things that has...
What if sin isn't the cause of all the bad or counterproductive things we do? And what if blaming it on sin does harm? I wrote this reflection two years ago, and was revisiting it recently and realized it fit in so well with Christmas! Keith and I will talk about...
Modern evangelicals are often closet fundamentalists. They may wear hip clothing, and they may try to sound "cool", but they often look far more like fundamentalists than they do like Jesus. This week on the Bare Marriage podcast (dropping tomorrow), Keith and I are...
Scripture does not say that our goal in life is to be married. If anything, 1 Corinthians 7 says the opposite, that people should remain single if they can. Marriage is nowhere mentioned as the main reason that God created us, and is certainly not mentioned as a...
We need to listen to the stories of missionary kids. Holly Berkley Fletcher released an amazing book called Missionary Kids that I read all in one sitting. I was riveted. Holly grew up as a missionary kid. And she interviewed a whole bunch of missionary kids, some...
Social media comments often give a sobering insight into what men are thinking. And today I'd like to show you what a thematic analysis of social media comments would look like! As you may know, we're quite busy behind the scenes drafting academic papers, some in...
One of the most frequent questions I get from men is this one: How can I get my wife to understand my sexual needs? He feels like he’s in a sex-starved marriage, and he’s desperate for sex. But the more he talks about sex, the more his wife pulls away. What’s the...