Maybe orgasm is elusive because we're going about it wrong. I’m pretty sure that when most people start The Orgasm Course, they’re going to head right to Module 4. That’s where we talk about sexual technique and how to figure out arousal and orgasm. That’s where we go...
It's time to talk about orgasms! We spend a lot of time on the Bare Marriage podcast and blog talking about what's gone WRONG in evangelical teaching. But we also want to teach how to make things go right. Four years ago, after we had finished our research for The...
Hi, everyone! This week we're talking about orgasm--because it matters! We spend a lot of time on the blog talking about where teaching has gone wrong and made our marriages and sex lives worse. But we've also created a ton of content, including courses, that teach...
Can we have a nuanced discussion about porn and the likelihood of recovery? One of our goals for what we do is to help people have "informed consent"--in other words, before they make a decision, they need to know all the facts. We can't be afraid of data and...
What if both purity culture and the hookup culture are teaching people to treat sex with dissociation and disconnection?Sheila here! Today I'm proud to turn the blog over to Sam Jolman, a licensed counselor in Colorado who is passionate about promoting a healthy idea...
Just a super quick post today on why "equality" sometimes misses the boat when it comes to sexual pleasure. I use Tuesdays either to take a day off from writing the blog, or to share something super quick that's on my mind and I just want to write it out. I'm hoping...
God does not ask us to consent to selfish sex. In fact, one-sided intercourse is not sex. I can summarize The Great Sex Rescue by saying that sex is supposed to be MUTUAL, INTIMATE, and PLEASURABLE FOR BOTH. That's what God intended. Sex is not merely intercourse...
For the last three years I've been trying to change the evangelical conversation about sex. I've been pointing out how we went so very far off track with so much of our messaging in our best-sellers--focusing on men's satisfaction and ignoring women's; seeing sex as a...
Baptist News covered The Great Sex Rescue--and had a great interview with a pastor! One of our frustrations with publicity for The Great Sex Rescue is that mainstream American Christian outlets (magazines, websites, radio shows, etc.) won't cover it. In other...
How many Christian husbands see sex in a healthy way? We know that sexual sin, and porn use, and objectification of women are rampant. But it's not everywhere. So how many guys aren't affected by this? In February and March I'm posting several "number of the day"...
Is lust really every man's battle? And how do we handle different libidos? It's launch week for The Good Guy's Guide to Great Sex and The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex, and I wanted to save some of our most important findings from our men's survey for this special...
Does lust have to be every man's battle? The Every Man's Battle book series has sold 4,000,000 copies, and they've certainly spread the idea that lust is, indeed, what every man struggles with. And people do believe it in large numbers. 62% of women and 73% of men...
Can we please change the way we talk about women not wanting to have sex? I've seen a few videos on TikTok lately where Christian men bemoan the fact that women stop wanting sex once they get married, and call this "emotional damage." I do agree that if a spouse...
Growing up, we hear, over and over again: "Just wait for the wedding night! The wedding night will the most magical night of your life!" We get that message from our youth groups; from movies; from bridal magazines. The honeymoon is the pinnacle of your sexual life...
Can sex be hot and holy at the same time? One of my big picture passions that I want people to understand is that sex is more than just physical--it's supposed to be deeply intimate too. And maybe to understand that, we need to take a step back to see what God thinks...